#did I make this more heartbreaking
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i leave him to you. | i got it ... my hero.
#mha 413#when the doomed yaoi is doomed twice😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂#how could horikoshi do this to them. to US#they alrdy dead how can u make them suffer even more#LIKE HE DID NOT NEED TO MAKE YOICHIS EXPRESSION AS HEARTBREAKING AS IT IS IN THAT TINY ASS PANEL#i swear to god if they have an even more tragic ending#hori . listen to me. please make them meet again after this. you better.#mha manga spoilers#kudoichi#ichinii#shigaraki yoichi#yoichi shigaraki#mha kudou#his name is now kudou my hero since thats all we know about him😭#second one for all user#when heroes would still sacrifice themselves for the greater good#even in death bruh god let them REST.#duo holders#dahlia.art
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*Holds up Félix and Chloé* It’s not obvious because it’s all WIPs and very little has been posted but I care them so much. I love putting them in a room together and locking the door to see what happens. They’re two somewhat territorial cats who are fighting one minute, then totally chill the next. They’re judging each other. They like to hang out and judge other people. They’re mocking each other one minute and then planning each other’s parents’ (Andre and Audrey’s/Colt’s) murders. Amélie invites Chloé over and treats her like a daughter. Chloé is breaking down crying in Amélie’s arms because she feels loved one moment, then smirking at Félix because she’s stealing his mom five minutes later. Sabrina knows Félix by his full government name due to Chloé’s ranting but has never formally met him. They both love Adrien so much but they’re not the greatest at remembering to tell him. They both have so many issues. They complain about each other. They have blackmail material for days. They would kill for one another if it came down to it. Do you feel me. Do you get me. Did any of that make sense. I know I’m taking a five second interaction and allusions to what their relationship was before and blowing it up out of proportion but they interest me so MUCH and I WILL make headcanons about it.
#One of these days I’ll get to write something proper and my rambling will make more sense#there’s a few moments in CTS that I really wanna get to bc they mean so much to me#I wanna see them interact more. I think it’ll be funny/interesting/heartbreaking. I’ll take anything#I haven’t written anything for it but I do think it would be interesting to have them talk post season 5#Where Chloé is at her lowest and thinks she can’t get better. and then Félix rocks up like ‘Been there#‘C’mon let’s get you some self reflection and view changing experiences. Or don’t I can’t make you’#and she’s like ‘What you’re suddenly perfect now??’ and he’s like ‘HA. no. but I’m getting better. trying to anyways. and you can too’#‘But you have to WANT to.’#and. yeah. I just think about them a lot okay#miraculous ladybug#felix graham de vanily#felix fathom#chloe bourgeois#SB Speaks#SB Rambles#oh boy I did a lot of rambling
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I've been thinking about the tragedy of Elizabeth Woodville living to see the end of her family name.
I don't mean her family with her husband, which lived on through her daughter and grandson. I mean her own.
Her sisters died, one by one, many of them after 1485. When Elizabeth died, only Katherine was left, and she would die before the turn of the century as well.
All her brothers died, too. Lewis died in childhood. John was executed. Anthony was murdered. Lionel died suddenly in the peak of Richard's reign, unable to see his niece become queen. Edward perished at war. Richard died in grieving peace. For all the violence and judgement the family endured, it was "an accident of biology" that ended their line: none of the brothers left heirs, and the Woodville name was extinguished. We know the family was aware of this. We know they mourned it, too:
“Buy a bell to be a tenor at Grafton to the bells now there, for a remembrance of the last of my blood.”
Elizabeth lived through the deposition and death of her young sons, and lived to see the end of her own family name. It must have been such a haunting loss, on both sides.
#(the quote is by Richard Woodville in his deathbed will; he was the last of the Woodville brothers to die)#elizabeth woodville#woodvilles#my post#to be clear I am not arguing that the death of an English gentry family name is some kind of giant tragedy (it absolutely the fuck is not)#I'm trying to put it into perspective with regards to what Elizabeth may have felt because we know her family DID feel this way#writing this kinda reminded me of how I am just not fond at all about the way Elizabeth's experiences in 1483-85 are written about#and the way lots so many of the unprecedentedly horrifying aspects are overlooked or treated so casually:#the seizure and murder of two MINOR sons and the illegal execution of another;#her sheer vulnerability in every way compared to all her queenly predecessors; how she was harassed by 'dire threats' for months;#how she had 5 very young daughters with her to look after at the time (Bridget and Katherine were literally 3 and 4 years old);#how unprecedented Richard's treatment of her was: EW was the first queen of england to be officially declared an adulteress;#and the first and ONLY queen to be officially accused of witchcraft#(Joan of Navarre was accused of her treason; she was never explicitly accused of witchcraft on an official level like EW was)#the first crowned queen of england to have her marriage annulled; and the first queen to have her children officially bastardized#what former queens endured through rumors* were turned into horrifying realities for her.#(I'm not trying to downplay the nightmare of that but this was fundamentally on a different level altogether)#nor did Elizabeth get a trial or appeal to the church. like I cannot emphasize this enough: this was not normal for queens#and not normal for depositions. ultimately what Richard did *was* unprecedented#and of course let's not forget that Elizabeth had literally just been unexpectedly widowed like 20 days before everything happened#I really don't feel like any of this is emphasized as much as it should be?#apart from the horrifying death of her sons - but most modern books never call it murder they just write that they 'disappeared'#and emphasize that ACTUALLY we don't know what happened to them (this includes Arlene Okerlund)#rather than allowing her to have that grief (at the very least)#more time is spent dealing with accusations that she was a heartless bitch or inconsistent intriguer for making a deal with Richard instead#it also feels like a waste because there's a lot that can be analyzed about queenship and R3's usurpation if this is ever explored properly#anyway - it's kinda sad that even after Henry won and her daughter became queen EW didn't really get a break#her family kept dying one by one and the Woodville name was extinguished. and she lived to see it#it's kinda heartbreaking - it was such a dramatic rise and such a slow haunting fall#makes for a great story tho
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My thoughts on how the Milgram mv machine works based on the evidence we have:
(I know there’s been discussion about where exactly the interrogations take place, but wherever they are,) the prisoners are made to sit in a specific chair near the wall that houses the machine.
It’s ordinarily hidden, but the wall panels shift aside to reveal it when the mechanical sounds play in the dramas. As well as the walls moving, the chair transforms to restrain the prisoner and attach whatever it takes to access their brain. The fact that none of the more frightened prisoners try to run or break it makes it seem like they physically cannot. This is why Fuuta sounds so panicked, and why Amane is suddenly helpless in front of Es in their T1 vds.
(My mind conjures very classic sci-fi mad scientist machines with wires, pipes, lights, nodes, needles, etc, but I’d love to hear how other people visualize it.)
In some vds (maybe all? I’d need to check,) you can hear Es take some steps right before their iconic line -- it would make sense that for safety reasons, the power mechanism is placed across the room. Once again it could be anything, but the sound effect makes me think of one of those giant wall-mounted levers you have to pull down.
The voice dramas don’t really provide the type of crime details that an actual interrogation would reveal, and it’s odd that they’re placed before the extraction rather than after Es gets to see the new details. This leads me to believe the machine functions with priming. All Es needs to do is get them talking about their murder, so it’s on their mind.
The video produced is much like a (non-lucid) dream. Even if the prisoners figure out that this is how it works, they can’t control it just by thinking really hard about something else. The murders produce the strongest emotional affect, and that’s what it picks up on. If someone else used the machine, it would default to whatever gave them the strongest emotional reaction in the ~15 minutes beforehand, hence why Es’ video focuses on their daunting task ahead. (The Undercover theory is still a bit loose, though, given the private shots that Es wouldn't have known about). It’s why the videos are usually closely linked to the vd topics/beats. I also like to think that the reason their prisoner colors appear so much is because they’re looking at those colors on their uniform 24/7.
The bell rings to inform Es that it’s the optimal time to use the machine -- the prisoner has been thinking about things for long enough that the video will be about their crime, and if the conversation lasts much longer they’ll start thinking of other things. It’s at a different time for each prisoner because it’s based on the specific conversation. I guess Jackalope is listening in to the interrogation, timing it perfectly. (The only one that kind of messes with this theory is Yonah, because they just keep talking afterwards lol, but it could just show that the interrogation is still in Es’ control.)
Their “Sing your sins” is the final priming nudge to get them to think of their actions as a sin, revealing their guilt.
Once activated, the prisoner enters a sort of trance/sleeping state. It’s very much like REM sleep, with the machine forcibly activating neurons and recording the output. The prisoners have asked Es what they saw, meaning they don’t remember the mvs. I like to think the prisoners do experience the mv in real time, acting as the major version of themself that appears, but can’t remember it afterwards. It’s when you experience a dream, but as soon as you wake up you’re just left with fleeting emotions and memories right on the tip of your tongue.
The video plays immediately upon extraction -- whether on a huge projection or little screen depends on which room it’s in. It simultaneously saves the memory so that Es can rewatch it later (on those old TVs in the jailbreak mix). The machine downloads the song and video together, but requires special parts to retrieve them. The technology is pretty new and fragile, so if one is broken, there might be a delay between when Es can hear the extracted song and see it with the video. (That’s my justification for Kotoko’s delays -- after 9 prisoners the parts wear out, or maybe Mikoto himself overheats it with his complex situation.)
Based on the lack of conversation we get afterwards, I picture Es leaving before the prisoner wakes from the trance. The machine adjusts their brain back to normal before they awaken, restraints freed and able to return to the rest of the prison.
It’s very much like a dream, so it’s not harmful despite the amnesia/head injuries the prisoners have. It does, however, exhaust them. Brain activity alone takes a lot of energy, so forced brain activity with added emotional strain would cause them to feel pretty drained the rest of the day.
#milgram#👍👍#if theres anything contradictory please lmk -- this is how ive been taking the evidence we have so i definitely want to rethink things if#theres a mistake#but also i just wanna hear what people have been picturing 🤔#i mentioned it before but the jailbreak tvs really did shift my brain from sleek tech to clunky old scifi vibes#im also still partial to an idea mentioned a long time ago about the prisoners waking up to catch the last few moments of their mv#and how heartbreaking that can be for some#but i feel like it would make more sense if there was no direct interaction after the extraction since es is overwhelmed with different#reactions (from us) and the prisoners themselves are raw with emotion and fatigue#i like the thought of interrogations occuring in that big courtroom (seen in undercover and now deep cover)#but that room seems way too echo-y for the vds to take place in#and it seems overkill to build every cell with moving panel walls and access to the machine#so the jurys still out on that one#(also hehe im still so excited that my oc fits very nicely into all of this but i kept this post 100% canon compliant)#analysis/thoughts
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Hey nonexistent uglies by Scott Westerfeld fandom what’s up
#uglies#my art#uglies series#idk what to add i just read the first three books and oh boy was that a wild ride#if my friends and i werent such hunger games kids back in the day we would DEFINITELY role play this universe#oh man i want to be Croy so badly#i would soooo roleplay as him or zane theyre SO my type of character#i wish croy had more peraonality#same for fausto and Ho#i am such a sucker for them#AND MAN DID I CRY ABOUT ZANE#SO. HEARTBREAKING#ugh i want to discuss these books w ppl but no one i know read them :(#nee way this was fine. trying to design characters that are supposed to look the same yet make them recognizable?#oof
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a little while ago, a two headed calf was born and I instantly thought of beneath a big blue sky Wolfstar and how excited Sirius would be because “Remus!!! A two headed calf?!?!?” And Remus is just so heartbroken because he knows how the situation will play out and he doesn’t want to tell Sirius
no stop that immediately because this can happen with lambs too and I had the same thought when I saw that story and it devastated me then and it devastates me to this day. I can’t even think about any of that without getting choked up like I may sob I may fully break down because what if a two-headed lamb was born in that damn barn.
you know sirius would be staying there all night long with that lamb even when remus tells him it probably won’t live to see the morning. and remus would stay too and watch sirius care for it and wonder how it’s even possible that he falls more in love with him every single day.
anyway I’m going to go drink myself into oblivion now so I don’t have to think about this. x
#big blue sky#ask#I did google this though and apparently some two headed calves have survived for many months#but they basically never make it to adulthood#so I don’t know if this discovery makes this more or less heartbreaking#either way sirius is feeding that lamb and caring for it until it closes its eyes for the very last time
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You said that if you dated Peter or Wade it would make you miserable. Which– Okay fair, Wade does have a history of purposely hurting the people he loves.
But what about Peter? Why do you think dating him would make you miserable?
because I’ll always know I had the option to climb a 6’8 cyborg and I passed that up for a sweaty little twunk that I perpetually have to remind to bathe (sorry peter)
#I don’t know. I don’t think peter is good boyfriend material. I think his insecurities would get exhausting.#Wade has bottomless patience. me… I don’t know. I don’t think I could. I’ve got my own stuff going on. I don’t want a Project.#peter is definitely a project. and he needs someone with shed loads of patience and perseverance.#me I just. I wanna have a good time. so. come to me my big beautiful time traveller. whisk me away.#take me to the beach. you can disappear after I don’t mind I’m not needy. just spend a beautiful romantic week with me.#sci speaks#I don’t really know what kind of person I’m compatible with really actually.#all my relationships have been. pretty short.#and I don’t think it’s any fault of my own really. and I don’t feel any loss over them at all. like at all. I wish I did. but I don’t.#a sci has so very thankfully never felt heartbreak.#but it makes me kind of question what kind of person I am when it comes to this sort of thing.#because I really don’t know.#I don’t know if I want commitment. I don’t even know if I want sex these days.#I … weirdly… am so devoid of yearning these days. like I feel content right now on my own. I don’t even feel lonely.#I used to yearn but I think I’ve moved past it. and I kind of just want to have a good time.#and that doesn’t even . involve a relationship or anything anymore. like I don’t think I want one actually. it feels like I’m Over it.#it’s kind of great because I’ve never felt so calm in a long time. all because I decided that I don’t. actually Need anything.#I don’t need anything more than what I have. and that’s brought me rest after So Long being restless.#but if a massive time traveller came and whisked me away on sexy adventures how could I say no
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finally watched spy another day and it feels like the tin can bros ripped my heart out of my chest, put it in a blender, made a smoothie out of it, and poured it back into the gaping hole where my heart was.
i am forever changed by this
@curtmega
#how did they manage to make it ten times more devastating#OWENS SONG OWENS SONG#joey richter when i catch you#and curt KILLED ME oh my god this rendition of curt was so heartbreaking and i think im dead#sobbing actually#curt mega#agent curt mega#tin can bros#tcb spies are forever#spies are forever#tcb#tin can brothers#tincanbros#spy another day#dyingnerdyprude yaps
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"Because you're my number one... Twice"
#Fnaf#fnaf security breach#fnaf sb#Fnaf ruin#Fnaf sb spoilers#Fnaf ruin spoilers#Ruin spoilers#Roxy#Roxanne wolf#I mean AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#Ksnfhajxxhbebd#NOOOO THIS WAS HEARTBREAKING#THEY DID HER SO DIRTY#ROXY I LOVE YOU#I hope whatever next part of this they make has more Roxy and Cassie working together
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i personally cannot wait for s8 to start with an episode that focuses on the new normal under gerrard and on the eddie drama potentially. just for a small (or big?!?) bucktommy hint to be dropped in the middle or end to say that we are SO back!! 😍
Gosh, i am truly excited for whatever they do with the plot and arcs for the characters. It’s 911 so we know what we are in for. I worry about bucktommy for many reasons. I mean, we still have zero confirmation about Lou being back, and I don’t want to get my hopes up by going “when x happens” like certain unhinged fans of a certain fanon ship that shall not be named act. I want it so bad to see buck and tommy navigate through their relationship this season (I’d love to see them on a call together or maybe tommy gets hurt and we see the effect it has on buck), I really do, but unfortunately I will hold on expectations until there’s a undeniable confirmation from the 911 gods.
But we can manifest, besties. I’d love a big or small hint throughout the episode too!
#if yall don’t know why my expectations are so low I’ll explain here#I was in the#julie and the phantoms#fandom a few years back and I was very involved#the fans (me included) were really hyping for a second season as there were many positive signs that the show was going to be renewed#we all were like ‘when season 2 comes’ this and that#but as you can guess such thing didn’t happen#it took more than a year after the first season premiered for Netflix to say anything whether the show was renewed or cancelled#Netflix didn’t even have the balls to officially issue a statement#the creator of the show announced during a con and it was absolutely heartbreaking for all the fans cause we did A LOT#people created podcasts#got the show trending multiple times on here and Twitter#had watch parties to make it trend on Netflix#got the reaction YouTubers to become fans etc#and in the end none of that mattered#so now I take fan expectation with caution so I don’t get disappointed#911#lety rambles#bucktommy#ask
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He misses his mc so much 🥲
#xavier love and deepspace#lads xavier#lads seiya#xavier x mc#lnds xavier#the higher my affinity gets the lonelier I hear Xavier becoming 😭😭 You won't be lonely for long babe wait!!#I got Starry Sound did yall know this man sat in outer space and recorded a diary for you#half suspecting you'd never get to read it 😭😭 my poor little meow meow#starry sound was actually heartbreaking Xavier is always heart breaking out of nowhere#his pining is otherworldly he is Starving#i need to draw#the violet irises flower crown left an impression#and they KNOW i love flower language#Xavier knowing flower language just makes me want him more#i bought 2 new botany books I'm so cooked serve me up
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WATER SEVEN BABYYYYY
Look at robin reacting when luffy says he wont give her up.... 🥺🥺
This is a joke right now but its actually a one piece tenet aldjsisjka
Usopp aksbaksjakqk the foreshadow is foreshadowing... Also Robin being happy with the crew after the Aokiji incident... Fuck!!!!
Sanji thinking robin just vanished or flew away and suddenly usopp is soaring thru the skies... imagine
AAAAARGGGGHHHH YOU CAN SEE THE GEARS TURNING
Zoro talking to merry..... only while he is alone of course
Why are nami and sanji matching ajdhakjsk look at the citrus sisters
Carpenter: maybe it was the government
Gov agent: I don't think so, also don't say that they are everywhere
LUFFY SUPPORTS WOMEN'S WRONGS!!!
Don't scream att chopper like that!!! Look at him... So small....
Imu tease???? (No) (Also I've changed websites again bc the translation is kinda off , I can't find a good quality b&w spanish translation and the colors scare me (i want the real manga experience))
GET HIM ICEBURG!!!!
I truly forgor if this is just a lie about her wanting to find the rio poneglyphs or genuine because she wants to die and will do it for them... because in skypiea she says she is not interested in the weapons so maybe if the gov pardons her but considering what she wants is illegal then idk abdjabjs this is such a dumb thing to forget... like thats important girl where did it go (reading this after remembering and it's kinda funny... i will make any sacrifice to kill myself (and keep you safe)... she goes HARD)
Little paulie and mozu and kiwi.... omg hello (the SBS says the twins wanted to be shipwrights too omg)
Franky's backstory is small but it does so much for me like it is so central to the themes... boats and people...
DID SOMEBODY ORDER MORE TRAGIC BROTHERS?
The fact that franky needs to learn this lesson to pass it on to robin.... do you understand how big this is.... also Tom does exactly as he says and takes responsibility for franky and what he has done... because he has done nothing wrong AND THAT'S HIS SON and he just punched spandam bc he wanta him to feel the pain franky feels... Tom is such a man..... proud of having built eater 7 up with the sea train.... goes out with a boom.... should we all kill ourselves....
I am crying again................... franky my god.... and the fucking frog!!! And of course franky can't stop Tom's hope for his island... of course he can't.... he hasnt learnt the lesson yet but this guy isn't over yet!! He has a life of being a pervert cyborg ahead!!! Iceburg following Tom's footsteps but franky not being able to do that bc of his guilt....
This is one of the coolest things chopper has done btw...
NAMII 😭😭😭
Robin damning the world for her crew when all she has ever done is damn her companions for her own sake.... how big is this...
I can't take this...... it's always nami in these positions... it happens AGAIN in Zou with Sanji... there is no way
The love letter gag is too good like damn that's so funny
AND IT'S NAMI GOING THROUGH IT AGAIN!!!! SHE LOVES ROBIN SO MUCH!!!!
#OOOH GRANDPA TEASE!!! he wanted to see luffy too?? omg and he owes garp a favor so he is going to kill him... alright then....#robin attacking FIRST and ZORO coming to her defense!!! CHEFS KISS!!! INCREDIBLE#my GOD!!! ROBIN WANTING TO LEAVE HER PAST BEHIND BC SHE TRULY HAS BEEN CHANGED BY THEM AAAAHHHH#this is so good... aokiji had to end crocodile and he still has a debt to someone (garp?) AND smoker told him stuff about luffy too#kokoro is such an mvp... be careful with the government agents she says.... hell yeah they should do that#the people in water 7 just giving advice to the pirates akdhaksjak sure go fix your boat but down there#robin laughing like ufufufu is so cute... also kalifa knowing everything bc she is literally a gov agent 💀 ICEBURG WAKE UP!!!#lucci pulling out the ship of theseus response akdhakaj conundrum solved everyone!!!#usopp is so heartbreaking already... beaten he goes to franky to get his money back knowing he will lose bc he wants to fix the merry... go#zoro cutting steel like its nothing... yeahhhhh also does luffy think the ship and usopp are like sanji and the baratie??#he wants to sacrifice himself for it but doesn't realize his life is the treasure and not the thing... luffy realizing this is not worth it#the fight was insane.... usopp feels useless and is enmeshed with the merry so he won't let it go and tells luffy does not care when he doe#so luffy gets mad at usopp for lying and not understanding what is going on and says he is not a carpenter (true but hurts) so he is nothin#god it is so bad... sanji breaking p the fight is so important AFTER zoro says to calm down and talk but they rile each other up...#THE DIALOGUE IS INSANE!!!! USOPP IN DENIAL AND LUFFY TAKES ALL OF HIS BAIT IT'S JUST SO AJDBAKSNSKN AND THE ONLY LIES ARE WHAT USOPP THINKS#ABOUT LUFFY!!!! BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WANT TO UNDERSTAND!! HE JUST FEELS!! HE SAW MERRY!! THE ONLY ONE!!!#luffy just laying on the hammock for hours... telling nami usopp wouldnt give up his life for an argument... then he only needs to fight...#is luffy fighting usopp just so he can de stress kind of??? like he is letting him get his punches in and then he will come back#once he thinks things through... like nami did... and what sanji ends up doing too... like just give him what he wants#luffy likes fighting friends even and this is the only fight he doesn't want.... the merry crying GOD!!!!#the impact dial... it hurts them both.... jesus.... luffy got two hits in but those were enough.... they are making nami cry SANJI KILL THE#everyone is crying but sanji and zoro akdjsks yeah luffy got him what he wanted... he can keep the ship but he can't beat him#and after all if strength is made by conviction luffy knows he is right and usopp is just in denial... so of course he would lose#franky reveal and Robin assassin reveal at the same time.... just remembered when usopp asked her specialty and robin said assassinations 😭#luffy nami adventures hell yeah.... and theres even more after the aqua laguna... LETSGOOOOO#goddamn you can see the thread of kuzan finding robin with the strawhats to then cp9 forcing her to act in water seven....#franky acting weird because he is worried about iceburg... i know it...#iceburg: its weird youre working for the government... but thats for the audience to worry about. not for me#pluton was built on water seven ✍️✍️✍️ also iceburg saying weapons are bad no matter who holds them... yeah franky would agree#reading one piece
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𝕊𝕥𝕖𝕧𝕚𝕖'𝕤 𝕄𝕠𝕣𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘 - 𝟝:𝟙𝟛 𝔸𝕄 ⋆⁺𖤓₊⋆
[Stevie sits up slowly, the mixed scents of pizza, sweat, and weed only makes her more nauseous. The world spins endlessly, she can’t hold on.] ?: Look who’s finally awake. ?: I’ll just cut to the chase. We’re kicking you out of the band. [Stevie remains quiet. She’s worried she might throw up if she opens her mouth.] ?: It’s the third show you’ve missed because you were too fucking wasted to care. You’re a good bass player, but not good enough for us to put up with your shit. Get the fuck out once you can stand. [Somewhere deep and dark inside of her, she feels crushed. But on the surface, the parts of her she's revealed to the world, she remains a perfect picture of indifference.]
[Birds chirp, car doors slam, people rush by Stevie as she wanders through the early morning streets. She can’t stomach delving into the rush hour subway, and maybe the fresh air will do her some good. She walks on, aimless, the rising sun is no cure for the cold blood running through her veins.]
[Stevie pauses, realizing where exactly in the city she had wandered towards. The mouth of the beast, open and inviting, ready to tear her to pieces all over again. She didn’t even know the gig she was supposed to play last night was this close to his—] Stevie, mumbling: Don't be fucking weird.
[But her thoughts are intrusive, unavoidable. Detestable. It's so damn pathetic she can't stand it. She wonders how Jude is doing. Is he sleeping right now? Is he aware of how she feels? Does he still — But why the fuck should he care? For all she knows he's — moved on. The thought makes her feel sick again. She has no right to even be standing here.]
[Stevie gets ten steps away before turning back to stare at Jude's apartment building in utter distaste. She's been good, the meaning of that word muddied down to her own version of it. Avoiding this place had been so easy, so why now? Why, when she could've just gone home?] Stevie: Shit, I need a drink.
#the sims 4#sims 4#ts4#s4#sims#simblr#story tag#sim: stevie#STEVIE#...#STEVIE !!!#Jude's heartbreaker 🫵#I am so in love w her.. I would also be depressed for months#current Stevie is going through a Lot#she haunts Jude's thoughts and Jude has no idea she's still thinking of him too ;-;#ill get more into their past relationship and the downfall of it soon#but ive been wanting to introduce her for so long GOD#tw alcohol#tw drugs#mentioned and alluded to.. but there nonetheless so I hope I did the tw tags right#jude's apartment lot shell is by machinegrl ;-; <3 plan to make a post soon but wanted to make sure I credit it somewhere!!#sorry if there are any spelling mistakes </3
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Thinking about how most of the time when you have the option to stay quiet during a companion quest you get approval for letting them handle it and sometimes even get disaproval for talking over them
And then with Shadowheart's quest speaking up with Viconia not only gives a +5(while *keep silent* gives nothing) but also if you don't do that she will look genuinely scared when Viconia asks you to hand her over
#girl just wants someone to love her and stand up for her😭#I've been choosing to stay silent for all my pt's since I'm so used to letting the companions handle their own quests#so I always get the scared look at Viconia's offer#which is heartbreaking but makes perfect sense#she's spent most of her life being used and abused by her caretakers whose love was so desperate for#of course when confronted with that trauma she's gonna have a moment of doubt in regards to the person she loves now#but turns out just standing up for her beforehand cuts that panic short!#anyway I just think it's a very interesting character detail that having someone vocally have her back#is more important than leading the confrontation herself#bg3#shadowheart#also not to get overly self-indulgent#but you know that one poem about how to the author being butch means this feeling of chivalry towards other girls?#that feeling is part of why this romance works so well for me#Shadowheart isn't weak and she is the hero of her own story#but you do kinda get to be her knight in shining armor so to speak you know?#larian did a great job of balancing that with still making sure she has enough agency and stands on her own#and without ever making it feel like the romance is mainly geared towards men#I appreciate that
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My FL main went through some really weird, organic development over the...oh god, I think it's been five years since I started playing now.
So my main is named Skadi Larkin. They are a little bastard. They started out extremely 2D; I named them after my favorite Norse goddess and the protagonist of the book I was reading at the time. I originally wanted to make them female like both of their namesakes, but the second I saw the third-gender option, I thought it was too good to pass up. This is where they got their primary base characterization as a mad scientist who wanted to Cause Problems.
Then I started the Nemesis ambition and forgot which option I'd chosen for who I was trying to avenge, so they lost both their lover and their older brother under tragic circumstances (only the lover was killed by Nemesis's antagonist, though).
Then I got an Exceptional Friendship and had to give my tragic backstory in order to gain entry to the House of Chimes. Skadi pulled said tragic backstory (orphaned in a hansom accident) more or less out of their ass, but it did establish that their parents are dead.
Somewhere down the line, I realized that technically Skadi is a linguist, since the Correspondence is a language, and I made that their profession on the Surface as well.
Around this time, I started working on character designs for my fan comic. I got really into messing around with skin tone, and somewhere along the line thought it would be fun to draw Skadi (who was originally white) with darker skin, and it stuck.
Then I abruptly realized I was taking a lot of options that increased my Melancholy, and almost all of them were based on the Surface. So now Skadi has a longing for the Surface.
I left the game for a few years, but somewhere during this stretch of time, and I don't know how this happened, but I decided Skadi was now Native American; specifically, Metis. I changed their design to incorporate a sash woven in a style characteristic of the Metis, which also added a bit of color to their design (which was mostly black or grey at this point).
During this time, I started incorporating Skadi into my fan comic. This would eventually lead me to actually flesh out their backstory in greater detail. When I started playing the game again, I also created my first alt by total accident (long story), and I decided to weave her backstory with Skadi's.
So Skadi is in the interesting position of being an Indigenous person who is what we'd probably consider Two-Spirit today but they'd just call "Bollocks to that gender crap". They never belonged on the Surface, since the Metis are in a bit of a liminal space compared to other tribes due to their interesting background (the Metis are the descendants of French settlers and Indigenous inhabitants, mostly Cree), and Skadi exists in a liminal space within that liminal space due to only being half-Metis and raised primarily in white culture, although they still maintained a connection to it through their late mother. They also never belonged because no one else on the Surface outside of the communities they already felt isolated from would ever accept them for their gender. London gave them a chance to express one of those, but not both, and despite knowing that the Surface hates them just for existing, they still long to return.
#fallen london#fallen london oc#mild fallen london spoilers ig#there's a really interesting dichotomy with all of my fl characters honestly#skadi's is just probably the most blatant#umbra belacqua (my shadowy alt) is someone who both loves very fiercely and is capable of immense cruelty at the same time#in her backstory she had the husband of her ex-fiancee (who left her at the altar) murdered because she couldn't let go of her ex's betraya#said ex is my persuasive alt and is both very socially gregarious and extremely withdrawn#he probably won't ever get a spouse just because he can't bring himself to love someone else after what happened the last time#and he had very good reason for leaving umbra because he could never love her the way she wanted#and he felt that the sympathy she would receive from his family would more than make up for the heartbreak#since umbra is obsessed with gaining power and prestige and he came from an influential family#and knew that running away with the person he really loved would get him disowned#(he doesn't know umbra killed his husband btw)#my dangerous alt is my persuasive alt's sister#she's trans and badly overcompensating for it by refusing to wear anything except feminine clothing#because it hasn't quite gotten through to her yet that no one in Fallen London particularly cares about her gender expression#and she feels like the only way she can be seriously considered a woman is if she does everything she can to look like one#which causes her a good few problems because her one true passion is violence and that's not usually considered a very feminine hobby#then their younger brother (my watchful alt) is someone ironically very disinclined to violence who resorts to it anyways#the only people he's actually going to try to kill are the ones he has to kill for his ambition#and he's not very happy about it but he doesn't have much of a choice#because while he might not like bloodshed his murdered spouse was an anarchist who definitely did#and he's determined to do right by his memory by...killing a lot of people apparently#he is not a terribly mentally stable man and when i finally get around to making his account#he's going to have a massive nightmares problem that he refuses to deal with and keeps ending up in the royal beth for it#tl;dr all my fallen london characters are going through it and have overly long and complicated backstories#my main just happens to have the most overly long and complicated of them all
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🖤 (from desmond!!)
attractiveness:
repulsive / hideous / ugly / not attractive / unappealing / not unattractive / meh / no preference / ok / mildly attractive / nice looking / cute / adorable / attractive / pleasant on the eyes / good looking / hot / sexy / beautiful / gorgeous / hot damn / would tap that / perfect / godlike / holy fuck there are no words.
personality:
grating / irritating / frustrating / boring / confusing at best / awkward / unreasonable / psychotic / disturbing / interesting / engaging / affectionate / aggressive (when necessary in order to protect her as her sworn sword) / ambitious / anxious / artistic / bad tempered / bossy / charismatic / appealing / unappealing / creative / courageous / dependable / unreliable / unpredictable / predictable / devious / dim / extroverted / introverted / egotistical / gregarious / fabulous / impulsive / intelligent / sympathetic / talkative / up beat / peaceful / calming / badass / flexible.
how likely they would have sex with them:
not if they were the last person on earth and the world was ending / fuck no! / never / no way / not likely / not sure / indifferent / I’m asexual / maybe / probably / it depends / fairly likely / likely / yeah sure / yes / would tap that / hell yes / fuck yes! / wishing that could happen right now (the Pain of being married & being a queen & wanting to be a good role model for your children & ur sworn sword is a kingsguard) / as many times as possible / we are already having sex.
level of friendship:
never in a million years / worst of enemies / enemies / rivals / indifferent / neutral / acquaintance / friendly toward each other / casual friends / friends / good friends / best friends / fuck buddies / bosom buddies / practically the same person / would die for them / true friends / my only friend.
first impression of them:
i hate them so much / i don’t like them / i don’t trust them / they annoy me / they’re weird / I’m indifferent / meh / they seem alright / they’re growing on me / truce / I think I like them / I like them / I’m not sure if I trust them / I trust them / they’re cool / they’re genuine / I think we’re going to get along / I really like them / I think I’m in love / oh fuck they’re hot / I love them.
current impression of them:
i hate them so much / i don’t like them / i don’t trust them / they annoy me / they’re weird / I’m indifferent / meh / they seem alright / they’re growing on me / truce / I think I like them / I like them / I’m not sure if I trust them / I trust them / they’re cool / they’re genuine / I think we’re going to get along / I really like them / I think I’m in love / oh fuck they’re hot / I love them.
send 🖤 and my character will answer about yours; specify. || ALWAYS ACCEPTING.
#answered.#sevynhells#oh g-d what if i kms#dynamic; helaena & desmond.#she's c.aed- & d.emi so like. her falling in love w/ & especially wanting to be sexually intimate w/ sb is. Very hard for her to do#SHES LIKE!!!!! SO CAREFREE YET SO RESTRAINED AROUND HIM. LIKE. THAT MAN IS HER ROCK.#like ...... he & vaenna are the first people she calls for after aegon right after b&c happened#like. she HATES how he blames himself bc literally none of this was ever his fault#like. he left his homeland in dorne in the tor to SERVE AS A KINGSGUARD BUT EVEN MORE THAN THAT TO SERVE /HER/#he devoted himself to her in a way she's never seen w/ her father towards alicent. she NEVER feels unwanted or unappreciated around him EVE#he laughs at her her jokes even when she missed the punchline or gets it wrong. he never makes her feel like a madwoman like so many ppl do#like even if he doesn't understand she never once felt like he was ever judging her. that man will track her down like a BLOODHOUND#like i genuinely believe that helaena prayed CONSTANTLY for someone like him to come around & the gods gave her him#i genuinely wouldnt be surprised bc of how close they are that aegon would've noticed that & been like jealous about it bc he's possessive#but like. she represses these desires bc like. she's MARRIED & she's the QUEEN & she has children she wants to be a good role model for#& not to mention during helaena's entire marriage to aegon she was still loyal to him despite everything bc she wants her children spared#she literally wears gold after sunfyre & has a golden sun wedding ring & so when b&c happens that's just. taken away from her.#& then there's Also her dynamic w/ vaenna her childhood best friend & her whole conflicted sapphic feelings surrounding her#& honestly she feels ashamed for having those desires at all & not to mention he's a kingsguard member so if they did anything he could DIE#& like. she cares about him & i'd say loves him & she doesnt want him to get hurt. so like its. extremely difficult for her#so yeah helaena is. Very Conflicted around him but she genuinely loves & desires that man w/ all her heart.#if anything its probably more likely in a post dance survival au that she'd Say Something About It#but like. there's definitely subtle hints thrown here & there that she tries Not to let show but you can cut thru that tension like a KNIFE#iTS SO HEARTBREAKING MAN
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